BLACK THANKSGIVING

Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays. It is a time to get together with family and enjoy a delicious meal together. I love eating the turkey, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie, and many more things. Most of the time, the men would wash the dishes. I believe this was to express their appreciation for the meals the women had prepared (at least that is my recollection.) Living in the south, the weather normally allowed us to play outside in shorts. I even remembered playing volleyball with some of the older family members.

Thanksgiving is a day when we should think about all the things for which we are thankful. Some are thankful for family. Some are thankful for their health or their jobs. Some are thankful that they have enough to feed themselves and maybe a few others.

Some people even spend time on Thanksgiving helping to feed others. I remember years ago separating food baskets by areas and including maps so that willing drivers could bring them to those in need.

Following Thanksgiving is Black Friday. It is a day when many retailers have big sales and millions of people shopping for the perfect deal. I do not recall ever participating in Black Friday; though it is possible, my parents left home me to play. I probably got the better end of that deal.

Black Friday got its name in the 1950’s in Philadelphia because of shoppers and tourists flooded the city prior to the night’s Army-Navy game held annually on that Friday. Police would not be able to take off and would work extended hours to try to control the crowds and the traffic. In the late 1980’s Black Friday was reinvented by retailers to make it appear more positive, and it has become more widespread over our nation. It is supposedly the day when stores finally make a profit.

Slowly, but surely, retailers have let greed creep into the holiday. No longer does Black Friday happen on Friday. It begins on Thanksgiving (Thursday). What once used to be a holiday of thanks turns quickly into a day many retail-workers dread. Some never get to see their families on this day.

One thing that I am thankful for is the retail job that I have.  It is a second job, but it helps me to pay the bills, and I enjoy many of the people with which I work and the experience of Black Friday itself.

I understand that first responders and utility workers (my other job) have to work on holidays in case of emergencies. However, I would love to see retail workers that are not saving anyone’s life be able to celebrate the full national holiday of Thanksgiving to be with family. Even if the stores opened at midnight, the employees could enjoy a non-rushed Thanksgiving meal with the ones they love.

I have much for which I am thankful. I am now fifty years old. This has been my fourth Black Friday to work. I do not shop on these days, but I am thankful for the ones that take a moment to thank me for being there so they can save money. I wish everyone showed appreciation rather than treating others like you owe them.

Remember when you shop this year to enjoy the moment, but also to treat everyone with kindness.

When America Will Succeed

Today my wife and I celebrate our twenty-fourth wedding anniversary. I love my wife. I am incomplete without her. We balance each other out quite well.

Over the years, we have been through a lot together. We have seen our house destroyed by hurricane and flood. We have experienced hardships. We have endured arguments and disagreements. We have outlasted illness.

We have very little in common in our likes and dislikes. Our tastes in movies and music are quite different. We approach things in different ways. We do have a few things we have in common. We love God, family, and our time together. There are a few more things, but overall, we are quite the opposite of each other. People say that birds of a feather flock together, but they also say opposites attract. We fit in the latter group.

Overall, our marriage is a success.

America just had one of the most divisive elections in our country’s history. Rather than cover issues, we saw personal attacks most of the time. Personal attacks are not new to our political world, but this election appeared over-the-top in our modern era.

Scandals, lies, misinformation and personal attacks on character came from everywhere. Not only did candidates participate in this ridiculous election, but voters did also, as well. Social media bashing attacked not just candidates but their supporters. Friends lost friends. People did not hold back their intolerance for opposing views. America became increasingly fragmented over the course of the election.

So now the election is over. One candidate won making some proclaim America will be saved. Others cry that we are doomed. This happens every four years. We made it through every previous president whether good or bad. We will survive through this one, regardless of what happens.

One thing that I know is communication in marriage is important. If you disagree, it is okay to say so. Expressing your opinion or concerns is important so that the other person understands where you stand. Attacking the other is unacceptable and creates bitterness and conflict. Compromises must be made. Marriage is not about just the husband or just the wife. It is about both working together for the betterment of the marriage.

My wife and I compromise quite often, but not our principles. It starts off with simple things like going to bring her to get sushi. (Yuck). She will go to see a movie for me with an incredible amount of blood shed, though she watches with her eyes closed.

Doing things to help each other is part of what makes our marriage a success. The little things matter, sometimes more than the big things.

Partisan politics needs to end. If we want America to succeed, we need to understand other views. We don’t need to agree with them, but we cannot ignore them either. Everyone in this country matters. We need to work with the other side of the aisle and do the things that will help everyone as a whole.

If a kingdom is divided against itself, that kingdom cannot stand. As a nation, we are better together. Diversity, not just of culture but also of ideas, makes us great as long as we stand united. We need to work together and move forward. Like marriage, we can overcome a lot if we quit focusing on just ourselves.

A GLASS HALF FULL

I am a natural born skeptic. I do not believe everything people tell me. People quote fiction as if it were fact. I do not believe what I believe blindly. I research and study, sometimes a little sometime a great deal. When proven wrong, I have changed my beliefs based on facts and research.

I also like to look at things from an open point of view. I will debate a point, even if I agree with you, to see if I you can strengthen my viewpoint or to see a weakness in my opinion. (This drives my wife crazy.)

My outlooks are often different from those around me. Those who think they know me would often be surprised. However, I am not bashful about my beliefs. If you want to know, ask.

This week has been a demonstration of reactions to things that have happened in this world. Election results stirred protests, riots and a call for rule changes by those that do not like the outcome. NFL Football games brought the question on the radio, “should this rule be changed?” Racism has again brought the worst in people from more than one culture.

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Some people will see everything happening in a pessimistic way. To me, the glass is half-full.

I am not blind to the things that are happening. I also do not think the world is doomed. The world may have some negative things in it. It also has some wonderful things taking place.

Approximately 75,000 people were born in the United States last week.  Some will question kind of world awaits them. I prefer to think that many of these will be great success stories and others may bring something positive to this world.

Some people complain about how much money actors and musicians make or with what kind of role models they are.  I prefer to look at what some do with their fame.  Last week, Metallica collected nine tons of food for malnourished children In Colombia.

Some people dwell on the problem of sickness and disease, while a 12-year-old boy learned to sew and has made about 800 teddy bears to give to the sick children in the Royal Hobart Hospital in Australia to bring Joy.

Sure, there are many messed up things in the world. You alone control how you think and what you believe. What will be your mindset? Will you complain about everything? Will you lose hope? Do not dwell on negativity. Be part of a positive solution. You cannot do everything, but you can add something positive to someone’s life or to the world in general.

Do not ignore the facts but look at them is a positive way. You may even begin to see the half-filled glass as an opportunity. Life is great if you make it that way. It all begins with your attitude. 

Random Birthday Thoughts

This Thursday, November 10, I get to celebrate my fiftieth birthday. I love my birthdays. People will say I am getting older, but to me age does not matter. After all, it is only half a century. (If you made fifty before I did, I will probably call you old.”  I love this quote, “Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.”

People fear birthdays especially the big ones. Age, however, is just a number. I know people much younger than me that are in much worse shape than me. I also know others much older than me that are in much better shape.  Sometimes my mind and my body are not in agreement with what I can do, but life continues and I make adjustments.

I was celebrating my third birthday on the day Sesame Street had their debut. I loved growing up watching the adventures of Grover, Big Bird and Oscar the Grouch. Now I get to watch my G-Baby enjoy watching Elmo.

It is nice to have some things remain the same. It is also nice to have some things change. 

Since I was born, many inventions have helped us live differently if not better. The ATM helped me many times when needing cash after hours.  Cell phones make it easier to keep in touch. GPS tries to get me to the right location. The internet has granted us access to more information than we ever thought possible. Some of it is reliable. Fax machines, DVDs, and MRIs, video game, and even Post-It-Notes, have changed our way of life. I have learned that things can be fun or important, but people are more important. Let us get our priorities in proper perspective.

I have seen friends come, and I have seen friends go. I have seen people change for the better and some for the worse. Keep in touch with your friends and make new ones. I have had friends in their seventies and now have friends in their early twenties. Do not let age be a barrier to who you have in your circle. Everyone has something to offer. Add something positive to you friends.

Things do not always go according to plan. As I get older, I have learned to improvise, adapt, and overcome. This is a mantra sometimes used by the Marine Corps, with which I share my birthday. They, of course, were established a mere 241 years before I was. No, I was never a Marine, but I am thankful we have them.

I have been to many funerals over the years. They are sad events. As I get older, I have thought about what I want at my funeral. I want people to laugh. I want them to enjoy themselves as they remember me. I want a pizza buffet and an ice cream sundae buffet for people to enjoy. My wife drew the line when I said I wanted a clown. Maybe that would be a bit much.

My message for you today: Life is too short. Enjoy it while you can. Make a difference. Keep priorities straight.