SIR, PLEASE, STEP BEHIND THE LINE

I love the carnival season leading up to Mardi Gras. I enjoy seeing the float designs. I love watching the excitement on parade-goers' faces. The marching bands can liven up a crowd while staying in step and sometimes dancing while performing their much-rehearsed songs.

The way I approach parades has changed as the years have passed. As a child, I would try to catch everything to bring home. Now, in my fifties, I bring a chair to sit and watch. I occasionally stand to catch whatever the revelers on the floats are throwing, but now I give them to any child around. The children love to get these. You can see the excitement on their faces when they receive these beads are trinkets. Seeing their excitement brings a smile to my face.

A few years ago, I went to a carnival parade with some friends. We were standing along the parade route watching as a marching band was approaching. Marching bands have chaperones to ensure the band has enough space on the street, so no one gets hurt.

I was standing behind the white line next to the curb as the chaperone approached. She informed me I had to get behind the white line. As I looked down, my feet were already behind the line.  I said, “I am already behind the line.’” She then informed me my belly was not.  

 My friends thought this was hilarious and still teased me about this. I laughed, as well. It takes much more than that to embarrass me.

The problem was right there in front of me. I did not notice it because I was not paying attention to all of the details. I watched to ensure my feet were behind the line but failed to see that I still crossed the line with my fat belly. How often do we cross lines which we are not even aware we have crossed?

Several years ago, I was unaware of a line I crossed because of a term I used. I thought it was the proper term but was told it was offensive. Now, I am not politically correct but do not want to offend anyone. As Christians, we are called to love not to offend. I no longer use the term except in the proper context.

Sometimes we focus on what we are doing but forget the people around us. Those people matter. How you respond to people matters. Sometimes we do not recognize when we cross lines in our relationships. I ask adults to wait until I finish with the child when they interrupt. I also ask children to wait if they interrupt when I am speaking with an adult. We must treat all people with love and respect.

In business, lines can sometimes get crossed. We focus on the one area of business for which we are responsible but disregard how it affects other departments. It is not intentional, most of the time. We need to make an effort to keep the big picture in mind.   

Traffic can result in people crossing lines. They seem to become other people. An example is a sweet church lady giving the finger to the person who cuts her off. She crosses a line to become something because of an emotional situation.

We need to focus on the big picture. We must know our role in it. We must not think everything revolves around us.  There are many lines in this world. We, ourselves, may sometimes be “out of the box” in the eyes of others, but we must never cross the line.

Snow Day

I wonder if people in the North are laughing at those of us in the South. I know many in the South are laughing at ourselves today.

Today, we have encountered another snow day. The fact that we have had “another” in the past two months is news enough. It rarely snows here. I think this is the fourth snow we have had in about ten years.

Now, this is not blizzard-type snow, mind you. Last month, my house received about an inch and a half of snow. I doubt today’s snowfall can be measured.  I woke up and saw a few small thin patches of snow on the ground and the rooftops were white.

These “wintery conditions” resulted in schools and businesses to close. My company sent alerts to employees that only personnel necessary to restore power should come to work.  

Meanwhile, there are probably people up north who are shoveling feet of snow out of their driveways so they can get to work. I have seen posts on social media about how those in the south are more scared of snow than they are of hurricanes. That might be true.

There is a simple reason for everything shutting down in 20-degree weather with a hint of snow. We are not prepared to handle these conditions.  Some homes up north do not have heaters in their homes. They are not prepared for the heat that we get down here. Similarly, we do not have snow tires, chains, or the knowledge of how to drive when there is ice. Some may even question our ability to drive in normal weather conditions. Our cities do not own snowplows. We do not have the equipment to salt the roads. Driving in these conditions would cause accidents.

Now do not get me wrong; we love the snow. We just never see it. In fact, in three days the temperature will be back in the 60’s.  

In life, unexpected things can happen. Even enjoyable things can change our life’s direction. Suddenly you discover you are pregnant or received a promotion. These things can suddenly change your whole life. We may have been excited about the change, but not prepared for it.

There are also horrible things like disease or the loss of someone you love that can change everything. You do not want these to happen, but occasionally they do.

Whatever life brings you, do not freak out. If it is time to mourn, then mourn. If it is a time to celebrate then celebrate. We cannot possibly be ready for everything that occurs financially, physically, or mentally. However, we need to prepare to be ready to go through the unexpected.

We need to know where our strength comes from to endure whatever happens. Do not let it break your resolve. Do not let it stop you from being you. Learn to adapt to the new situation.

I am a Christian, and the joy of the Lord is my strength. That joy allows me to continue even when things go haywire.

A king had three men thrown into a fiery furnace for their execution, but they knew their strength came from God. They trusted God, and God gave them strength and deliverance. In Daniel 3:26 it says, “Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego came out of the fire.”

Just as God helped them through their change of situation, He will help you out of yours. Will you trust him?

When Being Nice Is Ignorant

Yesterday, I played a word game when a question and the answer struck me as odd. I researched the word’s etymology to verify what I read and was intrigued to find the answer was correct. This was not because I did not believe the game’s researchers but because I would never have thought this word had any connection with its origin. 

The word is nice. It seems to be a simple enough word. It is used to describe a lot of things. By definition, it means pleasant, agreeable, and satisfactory. It is a word that everyone seems to use. However, the word nice comes from the Latin word, nescius meaning "ignorant, unaware," literally "not-knowing.

I thought about this quite a bit. How does not knowing translate into nice? I was unable to find how the word has changed over the years. However, I would like to share what I think is a possibility.

Today, people use the term ignorant incorrectly. Some think the terms ignorant and unintelligent are the same thing. This is not correct. We are all ignorant in certain areas, but we are certainly not all unintelligent.

I believe that the connection between being ignorant and being nice is a willingness. Many things separate us from others. We must choose to forget who we are or who the other people are.

We must willingly put ourselves on the same playing field as those around us. Willingly forget class, ethnicity, background, and anything else that may hinder you from being nice. Those things exist, but when communicating with others, willingly put those things aside. They truly mean nothing anyway.

Jesus willingly laid down what others saw as a higher place to talk to those who were “beneath” him. He talked to the Samaritan woman, something the Jews would never do, first because she was a Samaritan and second because she was a woman. He allowed the children to come to him, despite the thoughts of others that children should be seen and not heard. He spoke to the lepers who were societal outcasts.

Today, we hear of celebrities becoming rude because someone does not know who he or she is. It does not matter who you are. It is more important to treat others as if they are more important than you are.

Let us strive to be nice. Willingly become ignorant of the things that separate us from those around us. Strive for humility. Strive to love.   Regardless of how diverse we may be, we are all part of humankind.

Romans 12:3 For by the grace given to me, I tell everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he should think. Instead, think sensibly, as God has distributed a measure of faith to each one.

2018 > 2017?

Overall, 2017 was a good year for me. I bought a new car, accepted a better position at my job, was able to stop working two jobs, and my second grandbaby was born.  I listed these items in chronological order, not in order of importance. 

Not everything about 2017 was great. Some loved ones left this world. Friends found out they were losing their jobs. People continue to let their political agendas affect their outlook on life and some friendships. 

We always seem to welcome a new year with a sense of hope. This year will be better than the last. Inevitably, I hear more people at the end of the year claim they cannot wait for this year to be over. 

Do people go through an entire year without any good happening to them? Are we so anxious as to grow old? I prefer to look at the good I have experienced and await even better things happening this year.

I, like most, look forward to the new year with hope. 

I recall growing up with certain New Year’s traditions. People would come over to watch college football all day long. We would eat corn beef, cabbage, and black-eyed peas. Black eye peas were to bring you luck. Cabbage would make you richer. I hate those two foods and still do. Fortunately, my wife does not like them either and we do not continue those traditions in my home. 

I am not sure how black-eye peas bring luck. I do not care. I believe that we make our luck. We think, prepare, work, and adjust to certain circumstances. These things bring “good luck.” Cabbage never made me rich growing up. It just gave me gas. I have become rich without eating cabbage. No, my bank accounts are screaming that they are too full. However, I am rich with great family and friends. I am rich with a spectacular wife. (I married up.) I am rich with the ability to enjoy life. I am rich in experience.  Money does not make one rich. Your perception of life does. 

I also quit making New Year’s resolutions decades ago. People resolve to eat healthier, get more sleep, and exercise more. What usually happens is we lose the same 40 pounds we lose every year only to gain it back before the end of the year. However, I give props to those who make resolutions and keep them going to improve their lives. 

Maybe we should start new resolutions such as trying to understand other viewpoints, not getting mad when people disagree with us, and looking for solutions to problems rather than sulking over them.

I do not know if 2018 will be greater than 2017, but I hope it is for everyone. If you are a person who reviews the past, I hope you see the good that happened.

When December 25TH Doesn’t Feel Like Christmas

I do not know when it happened. Maybe it was a gradual change. Today is December 25^th, but it sure does not seem like Christmas. It seems like very few days with this particular date feel like Christmas anymore.  

I am certain my work schedule over the last few years has something to do with it. I have worked on either Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, or a day close enough that would hinder the family from getting together. I am not complaining about my job or jobs the last few years. I am thankful to have them. I just cannot wait until next year when I should have an opportunity to spend the day with at least part of my family. 

We have already exchanged gifts. Some were given in November, and some were given out last night. With the way things felt this season, wrapping the gifts was not even important. Some were even given to the recipient right out of the box in which they were delivered.

It is not that we did not try to get in the spirit of Christmas. We decorated the inside of the house leaving the outside undone this year. Some Christmas shows were watched, though mostly alone. We went to see a pathetic light display that screamed, “Why did I waste my gas to come to see this.” Of course, we also drank eggnog on several occasions. 

There will be no Christmas meal at my house this year. At least it will not include turkey, cranberry sauce, or any other traditional course. We will not be together to enjoy a meal. I did not see one candy cane at my house unless someone brought them, and I did not see them. 

I have heard it said many times that Christmas is about family. Well, then today, December 25, does not seem to be Christmas. However, we did celebrate Christmas with part of the family in November and with some others a couple of nights ago. I love spending time with my family. 

Tradition says Christmas is to be celebrated on December 25^th. That does not always work for me. Christmas is a time of giving. It is a time to be with family. It is a time to celebrate the birth of my Savior. These things should not only be done on December 25^th. They should continue throughout the year. 

There are many opportunities to give. Some gifts can be wrapped and given for no reason other than “because.” Other gifts cannot be wrapped. They may be an ear to hear, a shoulder to cry on, or even just a visit.

We do not need holidays, weddings, or funerals to be with family. We should try to get together just because we love each other. Play a game of horseshoes, take a ride to the beach, or get together for dinner or a cup of coffee. We do not need excuses to be a family.

Celebrating the birth of Jesus should be a regular event. We do not even know the exact day that he was born. We can celebrate life with Him all year long. He came to connect us to the Father. We are in the family of God. Spend time with him. Be in his presence.  

December 25^th does not feel like Christmas today, but every day can be Christmas Day.

Page-Turner, It Is Not

First, there will be no Star Wars: The Last Jedi spoilers in this post. 

Yesterday, I had the privilege of spending time at the movies with my wife. As we watched the newest sequel, a short dialogue piqued my interest. There was a discussion about the sacred Jedi texts. The scene revealed that Luke never really read them, though they were readily available to him. Someone tells Luke that the texts are not exactly page-turners.

This reminds me of many things. I remember sitting through many safety meetings at work. They can be duller than watching grass grow. However, if someone pays attention to the instruction and puts it into practice, they can save themselves from pain or even death. 

Some teachers and professors may have the same effect as taking ZZZQuil. They will put you to sleep faster than any sleep aid on the market. They may have great material to teach, but the excitement level leaves you wondering if the subject is even relevant. We often wish to learn on the job, but gaining understanding before a task arises gives us a better chance at success. 

Even when you think of the Bible, there are some exciting parts. Many seem to have their favorite parts and read them repeatedly. I love to read Genesis, Joshua, and Judges. The narratives tell a story that reveals Godly truths. Others prefer reading Psalms or Proverbs, while others prefer the Gospels or the Prophets. I have yet to hear anyone say he or she enjoyed reading all of the genealogies. To be honest, I think reading the books of Numbers, Leviticus, and Deuteronomy is sleep-worthy material.

That does not mean that there is nothing of value in there. Every part of the scriptures has a purpose. Some parts seem to interest us more than others. We tend to focus on what brings us enjoyment rather than what needs to be learned. This leaves us unbalanced or with just a part of the truth.

Some people read the entire Bible in a year. It is their goal. While that is quite an accomplishment, I hope they got more out of it than just finishing it. If I finished it in just a year, I would not have time to meditate on it.  I hope they learned something and put it into practice.

Some people never read the Bible but try to quote it to prove their position. This is mostly done out of context causing their whole argument to be invalid. When you only see one portion of the Bible and not how it relates to the whole, you miss truths. It is then easy to twist its true meaning. That is dangerous.

I am grateful that we have access to the Bible. We can read it when we want. The choice is up to us. I suggest we read the whole thing. If you struggle with “the boring parts” read part of that and finish with something that excites you. Try to learn from everything that is in there. Many of the religious leaders in Jesus’ day were reprimanded due to their lack of knowledge of the scriptures. I wonder if that is because they only read their favorite parts, or did they just not seek to truly understand what they read?

Reading the Bible is important. Learning from it and living it is more important. 

 

Where Can You Go For Help?

I think about some of the problems we face. I am not speaking about irritations like not having a 4G signal, running out of hot water, or waiting in long lines to get a cup of coffee.  We have real problems. 

At some point in our lives, we all face discouragement. Things do not always go according to plan. Setbacks happen everywhere you turn. You cannot find the right job. The right person for you to be in a relationship with seems to be hiding. Maybe you watch the news or an election and lose all hope for the future of humankind.

Fear is another big issue. Sure, there are many irrational fears such as the fear of heights, spiders, or birds. (That last one in mine.) However, there are some real fears. The fear of pain, being lonely, and losing your job is terrifying for some people. 

Lack of opportunity seems to be a big problem. Some people do not have the necessary skills to find a job that will allow them to be self-sufficient. Education costs have skyrocketed making it difficult to make yourself more attractive to good-paying jobs.

Healthcare is a tremendous issue. There are so many health issues. If you are sick, there may not be a cure. If there is a cure, the high cost of prescriptions and insurance make it nearly impossible for some to afford it.   

Safety is another big problem. People worry about personal safety with murder rates, robberies, and rapes being reported by the news every night. We want to be able to go outside without putting ourselves in harm’s way. We want our children and grandchildren to have a safe place to play. 

So where do we turn for help? Psychiatrists, psychologists, and counselors can be helpful. However, many of them disagree with each other’s solutions. They may help give you a way to voice your problems. However, can they replace your despair with joy? 

Some government agencies or banks can help finance your education, but the rules change so often it is almost impossible to keep up. If you do get the education, to whom do you turn for a job? Agencies help occasionally, but by the time you finish your degree technology has replaced those jobs to some extent. 

Doctors and hospitals can help with many medical issues, but there are too many diseases with no known cure. 

We should ask God for a miracle, but God does not believe in miracles. I know that sounds unbelievable, but it is the truth. People would argue that God healed the sick, raised the dead, and even parted the Red Sea so he must believe in miracles. However, he does not believe in them. He simply performs them. 

A miracle is defined as a wonder, a marvel, and a mystery. The problems we face require a miracle for us, but for God healing someone with cancer is as simple as us tying our shoes. We face impossible situations all the time. With people, these things are impossible, but with God, all things are possible. God does not provide for our needs and wonder how he did it. He is not amazed at his accomplishments. He simply does them because, as our Father, he loves us. He responds to our faith when we ask. Our problem may be a lack of faith. If so, ask him to help you believe. He will help you with that, as well.

To whom do I turn for help when God does not believe in miracles? I go to God because he performs them anyway. 

Remember Who You Are

At some point in my life, I decided to collect hats. They were mostly ball caps but not all. When I was younger, it was unusual to see me not wearing one. My parents constantly told me not to wear them in the house. Today, I still have a small collection of ball caps. I threw over 200 of my hats away as a gift to my wife years ago. She did not ask me to get rid of them, but I knew she was not a fan. Unlike some collections that people have for viewing pleasure only, I wore my hat. Why possess something if you never intend to use it? 

Life never stops. It changes from time to time. It causes us to wear different hats, sort of speak. There are times when the hat I wear is one of a husband. At other times, I wear the hat of Dad. In the last couple of years, my hat has changed to G-pop. That is what my grandchildren call me. I also wear hats as an employee, friend, coworker, teacher, and writer, and the list continues. 

The problem with wearing so many hats is we forget who we are. We get lost in the things we do but forget who we are.

Life is a series of forgetting and remembering. Countless times I forget something when I can do it yet remember it when I am not home to do it. The same is true of who we are. I am not just a dad. I am so much more. I just have to remember I am also a husband and all of the things listed above and more.

There are many troubles we can avoid if we remember who we are. So many things God provides to us solely on who are. We remember our roles, but we forget who we are. We are children of God. That makes me a son and not just any son. I am the son of my Father. Sometimes we think of ourselves as servants of God, like the oldest son in the story of the prodigal son. We think that who we are does nothing for us but creates responsibilities. However, the oldest son forgot that he was the son. Everything the father had was his. He had access to his inheritance even while his father was alive. He just never asked his father any of it.

We must remember who we are. You may even need to remind yourself several times a day that you are the son/daughter of your Father. All that he has is yours. We seem to forget our identity by remembering the various hats we wear in life. Remind yourself often. I am the son/daughter of my Father. He made me in his image. I am beautiful and perfect, and he created me to be loved.

Everyone forgets who he or she is from time to time. We need to stop forgetting to remember. Life will throw curve balls at you. Things that make it easy to forget your identity abound.  Do not allow stress, shame, grief, or fear to cause havoc in your life. However, if they do, all you have to do is remember. I am the son/daughter of my Father. He holds no grudges. He is a forgiving Father. He welcomes me with open arms and love. He wants to be in our presence just as he desires for us to enjoy his presence.

Sometimes we judge ourselves unworthy of being a son, like the youngest son in the parable of the prodigal son. He thought he was unworthy to be a son. He believed he should be treated like a slave when he returned. However, like him, the truth is that we are the sons/daughters of the Father. The youngest son believed a lie. We give lies about our identity power when we judge ourselves as powerless or weak or hold onto doubts. Forget your self-judgments. Remember who you are.

Great Exploits

Josheb-Basshebeth killed eight hundred men with his sword in one encounter. Eleazar faced an army alone when the rest of his army ran away. He defeated that army with his sword. He fought so hard and long that his sword froze in his hand. Benaiah killed Moab’s two mightiest warriors, killed a lion in a pit on a snowy day, and having only a club took the spear from a huge Egyptian and killed him with it. These are just three of those listed among David’s Mighty Men.

There are many recent exploits out there as well. Dean Karnazes is an endurance runner. He once ran 350 miles in 80 hours and 44 minutes without sleep in 2005. Mariusz Pudzianowski does a 640-pound bench press, 859-pound squats, and a 947-pound deadlift. He holds five titles as World’s Strongest Man.

We love to hear about great exploits. People all around the world doing extraordinary things of which most of us can only dream. I used to love reading the Guinness Book of World Records. I enjoy seeing exploits others have done that exceed my capabilities. Many of the records were oddities that most of us would never even attempt. However, many would be willing to try something odd just to see if we could do it. I once succeeded (depending on your definition of success) in drinking 1 gallon of whole milk in under seven minutes. No, I will not try that endeavor again.

These people did not start being able to do these things. They had to start from somewhere. Like the rest of us, Dean had to learn to crawl, then walk, and then run. He began running home from kindergarten and took up running for fun. He is just an ordinary man from California who does extraordinary things.

David’s mighty men may have been great warriors, but many, if not all of them came to David when he was hiding for his life in the Cave of Adullam. They were in distress, in debt, and/or discontented. They were ordinary people.

Most of us can relate to their problems. Stress may overcome us. Our debt may be overwhelming. We may have become bitter because of things that have occurred in our lives. These things can hold us down and imprison us from doing anything great with our lives.

Our past often holds us back. Sure, bad things will happen. However, you must decide to let it go.

These men put their trust in David as their leader. David chose God as his leader. When you trust God, nothing will be impossible for you. One of our biggest problems is that we do not want to let go. We grow comfortable in our misery. We may even like having something about which we can complain. How can we move forward if we stay in the past?

Regardless of where you have been, you have a bright future if you do not let the past hold you back. Let God take your pain. You must give it to him, never to take it back again. Trust God to get you through your problems. Follow his wisdom.

When you quit looking at your problems, you may be able to be a great warrior to save someone else. Look to see what good you can do. Feed the hungry, visit the lonely, or volunteer to make a difference in someone’s life.

Joy versus Happiness

While my grandson was still in the hospital after his birth, my wife and I had the privilege of babysitting my granddaughter.  At only two and a half years old, she is sweet, funny, and adventurous. She loves wearing dresses, fixing her hair and playing rough. She knows what she wants and is not bashful in telling you what she does not want. Any grandparent can tell you all about their grandchildren and are more than willing to do so. My favorite thing to see on her face is the joy.

Is there anything better to see on a child’s face than joy? They do not need a lot. The small things bring them joy. My granddaughter loves to swing. When I take her to the park that is the first thing she wants to do. She wants her G-Pop to push her on the swing. Her face lights up. Her mouth opens wide with a smile. That smile turns into a giggle and then a laugh as I joke and push her on the swing.

It is harder to see the joy on an adult’s face. We get so busy with the things in this world that we forget how to be joyful. We stress. We overwork ourselves. We focus on the big things. We spend money to find happiness only to find that joy cannot be purchased. Some people confuse happiness for joy, but they are not the same thing.

“Joy and happiness are wonderful feelings to experience but are very different. Joy is more consistent and is cultivated internally. It comes when you make peace with who you are, why you are and how you are, whereas happiness tends to be externally triggered and is based on other people, things, places, thoughts, and events.” - Psychologies

I remember times when I was happy because of things that were happening around me. Friends or family were gathered, the Saints won the Super Bowl, and the purchase of a new home or car all made me happy If and when these things happen again, I will be happy again.

 I remember when I truly gave my life to my heavenly Father by putting my trust in his son, Jesus. A joy came alive in me. This joy was something different from happiness. It was something that I would have regardless of what was happening around me. Joy is not dictated by my circumstances. Chaos can be happening all around, yet joy is still sustainable. I know who I am. I know to whom I belong. I am at peace and am full of joy.

I know that joy can be stolen from you. I ran into an old friend who had retired and told me I must have gotten married. I told him I had recently married my wife but asked how he came to that conclusion. He told me that it was because as we spoke, nothing used to bother me. Things would roll off my back. In the few minutes we spoke, he could tell that I was carrying stress. Something was stealing my joy. He was right. I had lost my joy. No, my wife did not steal it from me.  My focus on taking care of my family’s needs and responsibilities became a burden that took away my joy. I love my family. I love taking care of my family. The problem was not my family; it was my allowing the stress to overpower my joy.

I made a conscious effort to take back my joy. I realize that my responsibilities continue, and I will not allow hardships to overcome my joy. I have people that ask how I can still smile through all the hardships I have endured. It is because of my joy. My joy was a gift from God. I hold that precious gift dear. There are times I must remind myself of that joy, but when I do, it sustains me. 

Nehemiah said, “Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.” – Nehemiah 8:10 

Harmful and Helpful

There are some things in this world that are necessary like wind, water, and fire. There are also things that are very destructive like wind, water, and fire. Each of these things on their own is neither good nor bad, but how they are used can make a huge difference.

Wind helps supply clean energy to some places and helps cool us down. However, it can be very dangerous with tornados and hurricanes. Water helps to keep us hydrated and helps our crops grow. Houston, New Orleans, and Baton Rouge among many other places have seen homes, cars, and businesses flooded. Fire is used for warmth and cooking, but it can also kill and destroy miles of forests and homes. I prefer having these elements in moderation since I have experienced floods, hurricanes, and tornados firsthand.  

While there are many other things that can be both helpful and harmful, one stands out to me. The tongue is small. It seems harmless. Yet it has a way of bringing life and hope to a situation. It also has the power to tear down and destroy.

I come from a family where sarcasm and humor are practically a way of life. It is not meant to bring harm. It is used to bring levity into almost any situation. However, some people did not grow up the way I have. They do not find certain things funny. It took me years to realize that some people were offended by my jokes. (Believe it or not, it was mostly Christians who took offense.) Things that are said may seem harmless, but they can be received as a curse.

I have also learned over the years that you cannot stop someone from getting offended. That does not mean I should not try. There are things we can do to use our tongues properly. We should be kind when speaking to others. We need to learn to be nice to them. A gentle answer turns away wrath. It makes people feel better. Joseph B. Wirthlin (an American businessman) said, “Kind words not only lift our spirits in the moment they are given, but they can linger with us over the years.”

We should speak only things that are helpful for encouraging others. An encouraging word can benefit them if they are willing to listen. Of course, by listening to them we learn why they need encouraging, and our words can be more valuable.  

Another way our tongue can be used to bless and not curse is to love people enough that we do not expose their shortcomings. Christians have a way of gossiping about others by saying, “please pray for so and so because…” They then use every sordid detail they know rather than cover the person in love. We are not to slander anyone.

I wish I could instantly master the way I use my tongue in conversation. I am a work in progress. I hope I have blessed more in my life than cursed. I can only give myself to the task of speaking life and hope into people’s lives. There are too many others that would rather curse than bless. Let us be the ones that bless the ones who curse us as well as blessing those who bless us. 

Politics > Truth

Politics is greater than truth. There I said it. This may not be what everyone wants to hear or believe, but it is how seemingly everyone acts. I, for the record, do not believe this way. However, much of what I see people doing is ignoring the truth to get their political ideologies out there.

Many people claim to be open-minded. That is rarely the truth. Open-mindedness to most people is that they are open to their own ideas but closed to anyone else's opinion. I can assure you that everyone believes something that is not true. That includes me, though my wife will not believe that I truly mean it. 

It seems like everyone likes to argue and I am not an exception. No one really wins arguments. How many times has an argument about politics changed your opinion? I have changed my view on a few things, but not because of arguments. I changed them my looking at things from more than one side of the story. If someone were truly open-minded, we would not watch or read only things that agree with our point of view. 

As a Christian, I try to find the truth even when others ignore it. People seldom regard finding the truth as a good thing when that truth opposes their views. Not everyone wants to believe the truth. They prefer their original thoughts to be right. Why let the truth get in the way? This is America. You have the right to be wrong.

This brings me to another point. Many Christians seem to confuse their place in politics. They believe the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence are equal to the Scriptures. They fight for their United States rights even if it opposes what God has spoken in the Bible. Last time I checked, this place is a temporary place for us. We think more about our rights here on earth instead of building treasure in heaven. We worry more about what the President or Congress are doing (or not doing) more than we concern ourselves with sharing the truth about Jesus Christ. The Bible tells us to obey God rather than man, but we hold onto these man-made rights calling them God-given. Yes, I am an American. Yes, I am thankful for our freedoms and rights, but there is a difference between being a Christian and being an American.

I remember when Jesus was running for political office in Jerusalem. Wait a minute. That did not happen. In fact, I do not recall Jesus speaking about politics unless asked. The Bible is clear about what we should do politically. 

Romans 13:1-2 tell us we must obey those in the governing bodies. It does not differentiate what leaders we must obey. It does not say obey if you agree with them. This is hard for close-minded people. "If so and so invited me to the White House, I would not go." Chances of being invited are slim, but the attitude behind these sentiments is unbiblical. Yet even Christians will say these types of things. The Bible says, "1Peter 2:17 Honor all people. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king." Whether this president, the last one, or the next one, do you honor the president with your words and hearts. 

I Timothy 2:1-2 tell us to pray for our leaders so that we may lead a quiet and peaceful life in all godliness and honesty.  Pray for our leaders, not criticize. It does not say pray that they die or become ineffective. Pray that they do the right things so we can be at peace. 

Politically speaking, I have my views and I do occasionally discuss them. I hope that my arguing days are over, but I truly doubt it. I just pray that politics never become more important to me than truth. 

Let the truth be greater than politics. 

Missing Them

Nearly twenty and a half years ago, my mom passed away. After so much time has passed, you would think it would get easier. However, at 4:30 in the morning while driving to work, I began to weep with thoughts of how much I missed her still. It was an unexpected moment. Why now? I do not know. 

Most people believe their mom is the best. I am no exception. She is obviously a major part of why I am who I am today. My children never really got to know their grandma. She died when my youngest was just three years old. I believe they have missed something as a result. 

This past Christmas, I lost my dad and stepmom less than a month apart from each other. If you know me, you know a lot about my dad. My wife would see my dad and tell me she could see my future. Later she would tell me I have already become him. I may not be as great as my dad, but even now as my eyes began to water, I hope to at least let my grandkids see him through me. 

All four of my grandparents died. Three while I was an adult. I barely knew my dad's father. The three I knew well, had major influences in my life. I remember watching Lawrence Welk and soap operas, taking walks on the levees, eating breakfast at McDonald's. Each one holds different memories. Each one has a spot in my heart and mind that I hope never fades away. 

A friend's mom passed away recently and asked if the pain ever goes away. Maybe to some degree, but I do not think it does. There is always a part of those we lost inside of us. A hole that cannot be filled. We learn to live through it. Some memories may fade. We may focus on new things, but that spot is always reserved for our loved ones. 

Life is short. While we should not live in the past, the past obviously has an influence on us. It shapes our thoughts, personalities, and behaviors. We learn from the people in our lives whether we realize it or not. 

I believe that my heavenly Father created me. I want his characteristics and personality to be a major influence in my life. I want to love how he loves. I want to show mercy and grace the way he does. I want to be there for the hurting people. I do not want to treat people who disagree with me any differently than those I love the most. I want to be kind. I want to forgive. These things are not always easy to do.

I hope the world sees God when they look at me. I also hope they do not see my flaws as part of who he is. I get those all by myself. I want to be like him even more than my loved ones from the past have become a part of me. 

I will never forget those that have gone before me. I pray I do not forget about those that are with me now. 

A Better Me

Several days ago, an old church song came to mind. I cannot remember how long it has been since I last heard it. It just stuck in my mind and at least daily, comes back to me. The song lyrics are “Spirit of the Living God, fall afresh on me. Melt me. Mold me. Fill me. Use me”

Those lyrics are a prayer that most of us should probably pray. Whether you are a believer in God or not, these words can still apply to us.

MELT ME

Overall, I like who I am. Sometimes this is a problem. When we like ourselves, we do not always see the things that hold us back in life. We do not always see the hatred, jealousy, selfish ambitions, and strife that often cause us problems. We see them in others, but not in ourselves, because we tend not to look at the weaknesses we have allowed to become a part of who we are. We need to rid ourselves of the things that hold us back. Melt away the imperfections as fire melts away impurities. No one likes seeing himself or herself as they really are. Very few people like change when it comes to searching our hearts, minds, and attitudes. Letting go of bad ideas, regrets, and offenses is not easy. Change is not always fun, but in order to succeed in life, we cannot stay where we are. We must get better.

MOLD ME

Once we have moved past the melting process, we need to move on to the next phase. Become molded into something useful. Do not fall back into the trap of letting the ugly parts of your previous condition form again. We need to transform into something that is pleasing and acceptable. We need to renew our minds. We often claim to be open-minded, but often fall short of that when people disagree with us. Stop seeing others as less important. Start thinking about things that are actually true. Think about things that are positive and pure. Let us stop looking for things about which to complain and start finding things to praise. There is still so much good in the world. We need to start focusing on those things more often.

FILL ME

Being an empty vessel does not serve a purpose. Removing the useless stuff in our lives requires a refilling. An empty container does not stay empty forever. An unfilled container will eventually get dust and spider webs or worse. Do not refill your hearts and minds with the same bad stuff. Be filled with love. We say we love others but we often demonstrate the opposite. Love others as you love yourself. Put joy into your life. Step back and smell the flowers. Receive peace. Allow kindness and goodness to become a part of who you are.  Temperance is also something we need to add. Without it, we lose our way.

USE ME

We are here for a purpose. We may not realize what our purpose is, but it is not to sit around doing nothing. We need to be useful. We need to start rejoicing with those that rejoice and weep with those that weep. Help those that need help. Encourage those that need encouragement. Teach what you know. Show mercy. Help others rather than waiting for others to help you. Bless others even if they try to harm you. Associate with people that are not exactly like you. Think of others, regardless of who they are, to be important. Be a participator in people’s lives but not busybodies. Listen before speaking. There is a world that needs help, so find out what you can do to help.

I truly want the Spirit of the living God to fall upon me. I want to have God’s personality, love, and strength. That only comes when you allow him to melt, mold, fill and use you. We often try to become self-made people, but no one is entirely self-made. Someone helped us get to where we are. I would rather have God get me to where he wants me to be. 

An Inconvenient Truth

In 2006, the documentary An Inconvenient Truth premiered showing Al Gore's lecture series on global warming. To some, this was a rallying cry to fix the environment. To others, this was a work of fiction that was just a waste of time and a money-making scheme by the former vice president. However, this is not a politically motivated blog. We all have our opinions on the subject, and most will not change. 

The title is what caught my attention and makes me ask the question: Why is truth inconvenient? 

Most of the time we are caught up in our ways. We have created our own realities based on tradition, history, culture, superstitions, and even downright lies. We even try to rewrite our history to make it flow with our own personal convictions. When truth and our personal realities do not agree with each other, we often choose to believe what makes us feel better about ourselves. 

Truth does not change because you do not like it. Truth does not change because it hurts your feelings or makes you feel bad. Truth is simply true. 

Someone on hallucinogens may believe he can fly. That does not change the truth that the law of gravity is true. Unfortunately, the families of those that have attempted to jump off buildings believing they can fly have to face the inconvenient truth that truth overpowered the perception of reality. 

Truth can hurt. No one likes to hear that they are lazy or incompetent at their jobs during performance reviews. Most people hear bad things and jump to the conclusion that the boss does not know the truth about how great we really are. Maybe we should listen and see what we can do to improve. maybe the boss knows more about you than you think. 

I remember one of my first reviews at a job. I knew exactly what they were going to say. I am detail-oriented but am old and slow. I even told the boss that before she started. I was right about what was written, though not in those words. You cannot tell someone they are old on the job for fear of legal ramifications. 

The bosses are normally told to tell mention complimentary thing about you and one thing upon which you can improve. To me, this is insane. I know there is more than one thing in which I can improve. I also know that I am better at more than just one thing. However, sometimes we do not want to hear the truth.

There are greater truths that are more inconvenient than those that are job-related. We need to stop trying to find truth in songs, comedy acts, social media or anything like this. Truth stands the test of time and does not change because of our ever-changing culture.

Many people disregard scientific discoveries because it does not coincide with their theological point of view. The inconvenient truths that science has revealed are that people may have misinterpreted the scriptures. Rather than go back and look at the scriptures to see if we missed the point, we choose to ignore science. 

Others choose to ignore the scriptures because they cannot believe in something that goes against their cultural biases. Many questions God and his word though they themselves have never read or studied it. Others avoid it claiming hypocrisy in the church. The inconvenient truth here is those same people believe professors, politicians, actors, and scientists forgetting about the hypocrisy that goes on in those professions. 

Some people say the truth will set you free. That is not entirely accurate. In order for the truth to set you free, you must know the truth. The Bible says, “If you continue in My word, you are truly My disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” 

Truth is our there for us to know. Do not ignore it because you do not like what it says. Search for truth. Be willing to accept that you may be wrong. Let the truth dictate what you believe and not your own thoughts and feelings.  

Friendship

In the wake of Hurricane Harvey hitting Texas, I wrote about dealing with the storms of life. After just a short couple of weeks, Hurricane Irma brought a lot of damage and destruction to Florida. I have family that stayed behind because of job responsibilities. I have friends that were able to evacuate to my house for safety. Hurricanes are no jokes. They upset people’s lives.

Because of troubled times, we often see the best and the worst of people. Scam-artists take people for every penny they own or at least as much as they can swindle out of them. Price gouging becomes a reality. Thieves are looking for abandoned homes to see what to steal.

While there are plenty of bad characters out there, I prefer to see the good. The people who uproot their lives to help people tear down and rebuild homes.  The neighbors that stay behind to protect their homes as well as the surrounding houses that belong to others. The check writers that help finance the rebuilding, feeding, and schooling.

I am thankful that I had friends that allowed me to evacuate to their homes when I needed to leave. I am thankful for the family members that took my family and me into their homes for extended periods during the aftermath of our disaster. I try to provide the same opportunity to others who are in need of help.

This is where being a true friend is important.

Some friends are only there as long as everything is going smoothly. When the good times are rolling, they are there. Then they disappear at the first sign of trouble.

Some friends are only friends as long as you pay for everything. They never help and only seem to be friends because there is something in it for them. The trouble is that they never truly invest in the relationship. When the money runs out or you have given all you can give, those friends disappear.

Some friends are friends when you are around, but gossip behind your back. They are only friends now, so they do not feel alone. Normally they are insecure and just want people to like them, but as long as someone is around it does not need to be you. They use friends as a security blanket until the next cool person come around and then they go away.

I have a few good friends. Those that even when I have not seen them over extended periods will be there when I need them. I can communicate with them as if we were never apart. I can joke with them in ways that others may not understand, but it works for us. The friends that I let into my heart are true friends.

“One who has unreliable friends soon comes to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”  (Proverbs 18:24 NIV)

I try to be a reliable friend. I am not just a friend in the moment. I enjoy spending time with my friends. I enjoy a quick text. I enjoy sharing my experiences with them. I do not require them to do anything but be themselves and to let me be myself. Sometimes people cannot handle me truly being myself, though I admit I can be a lot to handle.

Friendship is a choice. Choose your friends wisely.  Be the best friend that you can be. Show yourself friendly to everyone.